5:16pm
Hi there!
The funniest thing happened to me a few hours ago! Warning: if you are squeamish about bodily fluids, stop reading now.
I don’t have lectures, but came to school today to get some assignments done. The catch is that there is electrical power (we just say “light” in Nigeria) in my school but not in my house. Sigh, it’s one of the realities of being Nigerian. Anyway, while I can use the library, I prefer to sit in a class. Bags are not allowed into the library, so I would need to take out ALL the materials I need every single time. This includes my laptop and its charger, phone and its charger, several pens, books, my purse… Needless, to say, it is a tiresome process. I also feel like I get a lot of o stares when I do this (although, this is probably me being hypersensitive). You can already see why I prefer a class. I also like to eat and drink while working.
After I settled in a class for a few hours, I really needed to pee. Sigh again. There is a restroom crisis in my entire faculty. You would need to go from restroom to restroom to find one that is unlocked or has water. So, I just go straight to the library if the first restroom I visit is inaccessible. This was the case today. Sigh yet again. I had to pack ALL my things because there was no familiar face to help me look after them while I went to do my business.
My plan was to get in, pee, get out
– Lami, March 17, 2022
Logging my really heavy bag, I headed to the library. I took out my purse to show security (three people) my library card so that I would be allowed entry. A dialogue would make this more interesting.
Me: [Standing by the door while bringing out my purse]
Security 1: Don’t block the door
Me: [Moves away from the door while frantically searching my purse] Argh, I did not bring it. [Proceeds to leave]
Security 1: Ahn ahn, wait naw. What happened? We are not God now. You can just tell us instead of just going. It’s normal for someone to forget it
Me: [Feeling really touched by their concern]. I am so sorry, I was not really thinking. Thank you very much, sir.
To be honest, I really wasn’t. I just wanted to pee.
Security 2: Are you sure you have the card?
Me: Yes. Thank you very much, sir
Security 1: [Responding to Security 2] Very sure
He probably recognised me because I visit the library quite often.
At this point, you can see that my plan is foiled, right? HOW would I be able to leave now that they’ve SEEN me ????. Granted, they would have regardless, but it would not have been in such a grand way. The crazy thing is that I found my library card in my bag while I was taking my laptop out (I decided to leave my books because I sure was not going to need them).
I finally peed, but could not leave immediately. So, like a coward, I stayed in the library for about 20 minutes, surfed through my phone, and took selfies.
One great thing happened, though. I found a video cassette! I took pictures of it and posted them on my WhatsApp status. If you do not know what that is, I’m older than you ??. Here are some pictures:
What would you have done if you were in my shoes? Shoot me an email! I completed this article in 15 minutes. I am happy that I am getting faster. Of course, I have to factor in the fact that all the content came from my head. If I had to consult other sources while writing, it would have been longer. I’m happy, anyway!
This is 500 words (or more ?)! Talk to you tomorrow!